well xanga,

i have been at college for a total of five weeks now and i have two more until my first visit home.

here is a photographic assemblage representative of my leisure time spent here at university. <-- (that's how college people talk.)

pretty much college is sweet.
living in san diego is far sweeter.

however i miss more than words can express:

my family
cleo and heidi
woodward park baptist church
driving
baking cookies
costco
my guitar

write me letters.

graduation pictures

me and my mummy before

matt and tara, me and brandon

julianne, me, krista

me and alex

class of 2006

matt, jordan, and brandon singing their song

me and sunny

whitney, kristie, me, and mark

me and suzie

brandon and matt, roommates next year

me and my family

hurray!

prom pictures:

one week till graduation. 
three months till san diego.
i'm really happy right now.
i love my friends and family
and this is going to be the best summer ever.

i've been thinking a lot lately about scary prayers. asking God for challenges, for patience, for humility.  He works constantly in my life whether i am aware of it or not but when i actually ask for these things and seek out His construction, it amazes me what He can do. He's given me not one challenge, but several.  He's making me patient. He's humbling me. and it's really hard. my life is being redirected and i'm so unsure of all things except for Him. yet this is exactly what i asked Him for. interesting.
i've also been spending a lot of time with my family lately. God blessed me with such a great family. i'd honestly call them my best friends. and my boyfriend amazes me. and teaches me and stretches me every day and that's all there is to that. and there's just been so many people who i've been connecting with lately and i love people and i need to spend more time with them because when i invite God into my daily conversations, i love my life.

anyways i guess that's an update. <3 

edit: meet my favorite thing to do. lookalike pancakes:

i want life to be harder. i miss challenges. i miss old friends. i miss roads with no end.  i miss not knowing who i was. i want my new start. but the closer it comes the less it feels like a new start.

i want to be friendlier. i want to be a social butterfly. i don't much like butterflies. i want to read my favorite books for the first time. i want to make memories.

God, you giveth and you taketh away. you give me gifts, days. some to laugh and some to cry. and i love them both the same. i love i love i love. i can't decide what i want of love. to be familiar. to be distant. to hold close. to push away. Jesus you are beautiful. i have a different picture painted of you from each stage in my life. and i love each one the same. you fulfill my needs. you are love.